Presents

It's been so long since I've written anything you probably thought I'd given up this blog thing. I've been pretty depressed lately, and if you know anything about depression, you know it sucks the motivation right out of ya. So...that's my excuse and I'm stickin' to it.

My husband and I have decided to try a new tactic against the OCD: flat out bribery. You see, a few weeks back, my husband walks in the room and says, "I see some cups without paper towels under them. How about you don't use any paper towels under cups anymore?" (Why the paper towels you ask? Well, I'm terrified of fever blisters, even though I've gotten them my whole life, and I put the paper towel under the cups to catch any germs that would drip down the sides. But you don't have a fever blister right now, you say. Yeah, that doesn't matter.)

So, I look up at my husband and say, "No, I don't think I can do that." "How about for a present?" he asks. OK. And that battle was conquered. They will not all be that easy. I was close to letting go of that one anyway for some reason. I hadn't been as consistent about using paper towels. But we decided to go after other stuff in a similar manner. Right now, I'm working on not cleaning off my purse when I take it places. The first couple of times, I still cleaned off the handles, which was cheating, but the last time, I didn't even do that. When I do this several times and it becomes normalized to not clean it anymore, then I get a present.

Sometimes I feel like a 5 year old being bribed with candy and toys...

After the Flood

Sorry I haven't posted in awhile. As most of you know, the weekend before last, the first week of May, Nashville flooded. My husband and I were fine. I often complain about our tiny, old apartment, but I've been especially thankful for it now as it kept us safe and dry. We know friends who were not as lucky as us though and looking around our city has been hard.

One of the hardest things about the OCD and a crisis like this is I find myself very unable to offer my helping hands. I'm freaked out by other people's homes on a daily basis. Add standing water, possibilities of mold, etc, and I simple cannot do it. So, I haven't been part of Nashville's outpouring of support to those of its citizens that have been most affected.

We've also, as a city, needed to conserve water. Now, as someone who has OCD and washes her hands many times a day, this could have been interesting. Thankfully, I've grown to rely more on hand sanitizer over the past several months and so it didn't seem like such a big thing. (Of course, I'm not ok that Target ran out of almost all the hand sanitizer and I had to get little bottles of the kind I don't like. But go Nashvillians for conserving!)

I've been feeling very anxious lately and I'm not sure why. I'm trying to sort through my own stuff. But we are thankful that we were safe in the flood and we're praying for all those who have lost homes, possessions, family and who are just trying to put their lives back together right now.